“I have seen everything that is done under the sun, and
behold, all is vanity and a
striving after wind.”
This verse from Ecclesiastes, ostensibly written by King
Solomon, is a pretty complete dismissal of mankind’s striving. The fact that Solomon, who had achieved so
much in his life, was so cynical about human effort, is pretty sobering.
Not long after I started college something focused my
attention on the large role that vanity plays in our lives and I have been in
equal parts fascinated and horrified by it ever since.
In writing this little piece of analysis, I am somewhat
fearful of exposing myself as a terribly vain and insecure person, but I am
fairly certain that I am not unusual in this regard, so I will take the risk. After all, Solomon is pretty good company!
I had grown up in the heart of the 60’s and my high school
years were a far cry from today’s cauldron of competition and egomania. Few of my classmates worried about grades and
we certainly didn’t talk about them. Even the dreaded SAT’s were fairly low
key. We were more worried about the
Vietnam War than getting into college and we focused much of our energy and
thoughts on the social changes around us.
Now of course no adolescence is complete without the ‘thousand
natural shocks that flesh is heir to’ during this period – the social hierarchy
and posturing, the gain and loss of friends, the athletic competition and so
on. But I do believe my generation’s experience,
particularly in the realm of competition and pressure, is a cakewalk in
comparison with the gauntlet that today’s youth must run.
However, when I went off to Stanford (okay, already a
pretentious remark – this is, after all, a piece about vanity!) in 1972 I soon
encountered a much more obvious strain of vanity than I had experienced
before. And I say this believing
strongly that the Stanford of my day cannot hold a candle to the super citadel
of ego that Stanford is today (see my blog entry on Stepford University - http://www.rvgeiger.blogspot.com/2014/11/stepford-university.html
- for more on that!).
My classmates were subtly (and occasionally, quite brazenly)
probing one another for details on SAT scores, family wealth, travel
experiences and a host of other scoring factors to determine the relative
pecking order. Even drug experiences and
joint-rolling prowess could potentially establish one’s superiority or
uniqueness in a group that was filled with super achievers.
This is not to say that we spent all of our time engaging in
such nonsense. But it happened often
enough that it made an impression on me.
I found myself envying some of my fellow students their wealth or social
position. Some could speak foreign
languages and I soon felt inadequate in this arena. I was repulsed by the posturing whenever I
encountered it, but I found that I was not above subtly bragging when the
opportunity came my way.
Yet the irony was that bragging and pretension did not
produce a positive feeling in either the bragger or the reluctant recipient. Why then, were we so apt to engage in it? What
possible benefit were we deriving? What
horrible psychological problem was at the root of it all?
And thus began my investigation into the complex web of
vanity, envy and competition that is both the curse and the driving force for
much of human endeavor. I am not quite vain
enough to believe that I have anything unique or definitive to say on the
subject, but I have done enough thinking in this area to pose some interesting
questions for my readers to ponder. More to come.
